Yesterday was hard on me. I realized things I really and truly didn't want to realize. It actually wasn't even things... it was one thing. That thing is called the truth.
The truth does hurt. It really does. No one wants to hear it, so most of the world is covered in lies. Everyone of us is filled with little white lies and fibs. According to Jordan 3 fibs= a lie. Just to throw in some of his knowledge.
Well, what I realized wasn't me finding the truth in a lie. It was just a simple act of finding the truth, something that no one told me. It was a subject that no one went over with a fine-tooth comb or actually brushed over. It was just a subject we left untouched for my own good.
Well, when someone doesn't tell you the truth and you're curious...you tend to go paroling around and stumble upon something that leads to a domino affect. Yesterday, I had the urge to flip through pictures. Pictures, and oh yeah, pictures. I wanted to rekindle some distant memories so I wouldn't forget them, and I stumbled upon some hurtful facts. Six is a terrible number.
All of y'all are probably like, oh crap, six!!! She realized after all that, that SIX was a terrible number. Poor Carlie. Blah. Blah. Blah.
Well, to me this number is dreadful. Six days was all it took to settle into my life style of thinking I was crazy about someone, decide to wait for them. Yes, six days took me to decide that. Six days gave him time to decide I wasn't worth the wait, move on to another girl. This wouldn't have hurt me so bad if he wouldn't have skype called me that night.
Yes, he video called me to check on me and see how I was doing. While I was giddy with joy that I got to see him, he was giddy with joy that he was about to ask a girl out.
These are the moments where I wish I knew then what I know now. I wouldn't have wasted so much time, but now I have standards. I won't go below them in any way, shape, or form.
I'm settling for nothing, but the truth.
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